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motet
Dana Davis / Moderator

Mar 6, 2006, 8:19 PM

Post #1 of 1632 (32534 views)
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Damn! I didn't get in...	Can't Post

This thread is for venting, sharing and commiserating because you didn't get into the MFA program you wanted.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 2:49 PM

Post #2 of 1632 (32821 views)
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I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and like I should spen	Can't Post

I think the title says it all :)

Congrats to those for whom the waiting game is (at least partly) over!

Those who fear the worst, enter this thread. Let us lurk on the darkside together. No more floating above the Waiting Game thread alone, cold, silently, & in limbo!!!

OK, we can't keep you out of limbo, but can help with the rest.

Ha.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 2:51 PM

Post #3 of 1632 (32818 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and lik	Can't Post

PS: The office title of the thread is:

I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting Game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and like I should spend the rest of the day in bed. This thread is for those of us who feel like we're out in the cold!

duderedman

Mar 6, 2006, 3:09 PM

Post #4 of 1632 (32822 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and lik	Can't Post

couldn't have said it better myself.

although you use a lot less obscene language than I would have, and I might have put something about getting uproariously drunk rather than going to bed.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 3:13 PM

Post #5 of 1632 (32813 views)
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Re: [duderedman] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

I can accept not getting in. I have friends who are incredible writers who didn't get in their first try. What is hard to deal with is all the other stuff - esp. wondering what I'm going to do next year. I'm not 21 years old, like some of the prodigies on the other thread :)

I'd totally get drunk all the time right now, if I could afford it. So I just make a lot of coffee.

kodi

Mar 6, 2006, 3:18 PM

Post #6 of 1632 (32803 views)
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Re: [duderedman] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

In Reply To

couldn't have said it better myself.

although you use a lot less obscene language than I would have, and I might have put something about getting uproariously drunk rather than going to bed.

I understand. Today I received a rejection from JHU. Last year I made the waitlist--there were only two of us on the list, but they couldn't offer admission because everyone enrolled. Apparently it's possible to get worse over the course of a year. I can't decide whether to have some vodka or crawl into bed.

sanssoleil
Chris

Mar 6, 2006, 3:25 PM

Post #7 of 1632 (32786 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

Thanks for starting this thread. I have been hesitant to infect the rest of the Speakeasy with my vitriol and negativity. I wallowed and whined all weekend, and everyone in my life is sick of it. I am doing teenage-y things like lying under the covers, listening to Elliott Smith bootlegs really really loud. I am becoming resentful and bitter. From here on out I will never read anything ever written by anyone who teaches at any school that rejects me. Even if it was Flaubert--if he taught at Syracuse I'd be emailing him right now to tell him to take a flying fuck. This attitude is poisonous, I know, and no good art will come of it--but I need to get it out of my system.

ciaosamin

Mar 6, 2006, 3:30 PM

Post #8 of 1632 (32775 views)
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Re: [kodi] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

let's see--here's my tally:

rejected at 3 schools

another school has notified everyone they wanted, so i am probably rejected there, too

and waiting on two more, one of which is brown.

i was just thinking the same thing about the waiting game thread this morning, and how lame i felt posting on there when everyone is talking about columbia's funding and should i get a second mfa.

so thanks for starting this thread, so we can all wallow in self-pity together for awhile. that's what i need, mostly. i am sick of people telling me i am smart and that i'll get in somewhere. i just want to mope.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 3:32 PM

Post #9 of 1632 (32771 views)
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Re: [sanssoleil] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

Poor George Saunders! I bet he was campaigning for you (just by reading yours posts!). Unless you're a poet, of course!

Man, oh man, nothing is better than Elliott Smith when you feel like a reject. Or are a reject :). I also recommend Johnny Cash to get you out of bed and acting like a renegade, and Nick Drake when you want to feel strangely at peace with your angst.

sanssoleil
Chris

Mar 6, 2006, 3:39 PM

Post #10 of 1632 (32755 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

I'd like to think George Saunders was campaigning for me...then maybe I could read his stuff again without feeling bitter. Yes, I am that much of a baby. When I got the rejection I was all "Well his latest Harper's stories weren't even that good, they were too didactic and precious." Which is, you know, bull, but I felt better for about a second. But yeah, I should bust out the Nick Drake, and maybe a little Leonard Cohen, take some Vicodin and eat a bag of Cheetos. Then return in earnest to jabbing at my Mary Gaitskill voodoo doll.

boy named sue

Mar 6, 2006, 3:39 PM

Post #11 of 1632 (32753 views)
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Re: [sanssoleil] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

hah, chris, i defniitely don't have your generosity in not infecting the speakeasy community with negativity. so, as a public apology, i'm really sorry everyone.

i hadn't even realized i *wanted* to do an mfa so much; i thought i would be content plodding along on my own for a while doing my other stuff.

(and i also succumbed to elliot smith yesterday.)

thanks for this thread, clarabow.

gingembre

Mar 6, 2006, 3:52 PM

Post #12 of 1632 (32730 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and lik	Can't Post

I want to be next to thank you for this thread.

Ok, so I only applied to 2 schools, and the process itself was rushed because I had dropped out of law school this past October and finally came to terms with the fact that I wanted To Beee a Writerrr!

The only school I can possibly attend (where my bf is attending law school right now) has, I think, already notified all the applicants it wants. What am I going to do with my life for the next year? I can't write because I'm too busy checking this board and other internet forums for acceptance decisions (my obsession won't die a graceful death until I receive the official rejection letter, apparently)...I really can't even stand to think about another round of scrounging for LORs, last-minute cramming for the GRE, and trying to cobble together a writing sample that doesn't make me want to tear my hair out.

What next???

commanda
Amanda

Mar 6, 2006, 5:36 PM

Post #13 of 1632 (32635 views)
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Re: [gingembre] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and li	Can't Post

I applied to nine schools for fiction. Granted, the nine schools I chose all range from painfully competitive to extremely choosy. So far, I've been rejected by Iowa, Michener, Michigan, UMass, Montana and JHU. I got the first four letters on Friday, and the remaining two today. Still waiting to hear from Brown, Indiana and Arkansas.

Lately, I've been partial to dark places: movie theatres, bars, sleep. I suggest completely avoiding discussing the rejections with your parents, (who will either marvel at length about what could have possibly gone wrong, or just say "I told you so."), and keeping the verbal self-pity to a minimum around significant others and friends.

Hey. There's other options. At least, I think there are. And I suppose there's always next year.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 6:25 PM

Post #14 of 1632 (32597 views)
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let's talk about options, ba-by. let's talk about next year.	Can't Post

so.

i talk to spinderella and she says that salt told her should all come up with one alternative plan for the next year. and peppa says that even if it's something you can't do yourself, or aren't that into, throw it on the board. i will contribute, as well.

my idea: travel for a year. with what money? i don't know. maybe that can be another suggestion.

poetastin

Mar 6, 2006, 6:33 PM

Post #15 of 1632 (32590 views)
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Re: [sanssoleil] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

Don't worry, sanssoleil--with your skinny little mod suit and relaxed posture, you're much too cool for Syracuse school. You're better off hanging in out in Portland, anyway, running into Stephen Malkmus at Powell's.

Besides, Saunders last book didn't stack up. And have you read Gaitskill's interviews lately? Wah! I don't have a pile of money to sleep naked on! Just a teaching gig and a "smallish" two story house...and oh yeah, lots of published books. I hate you, general public!

Who needs those guys?

sanssoleil
Chris

Mar 6, 2006, 6:50 PM

Post #16 of 1632 (32568 views)
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Re: [poetastin] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

poetastin--
You're right in a way. Powell's, in some respects, is a better place for writers than many universities. Cheaper, too--if you have some self-control when it comes to money-matters (I don't). And it is a town fit to burst with literary songwriters, so maybe I should just start busking.
Sadly, though, Malkmus doesn't quite stack up anymore. I'm in the minority with that assessment, however.

viviandarkbloom

Mar 6, 2006, 7:03 PM

Post #17 of 1632 (32551 views)
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Re: [sanssoleil] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

I'm with all of you. This blows. Five rejections. Iowa, Washington U, UMass, Montana, and Syracuse.

Elliott Smith is hitting the spot.

One thing I hate more than rejections: people telling me, "Of course you'll get in somewhere. You're you!"

And yes, the Syracuse letter did seem a bit condescending. Christopher Kennedy is on my shit list. Along with Judith Butler, Gary Busey, my neighbor, and God.

And the Montana letter said they could only accept one in ten people. That hurts. Their acceptance rate is ten percent? That really ain't that selective. I could understand one in fifty, but one in ten?

fictiondec

Mar 6, 2006, 7:28 PM

Post #18 of 1632 (32520 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and lik	Can't Post

Oh, it was a banner day for rejection-- Syracuse, Montana and Cornell all arrived today. And while I knew they were coming, it didn't make it any better to rip open the envelopes. By the way, I don't actually read the letters until days later -- just sort of skim them-- because I know that how they're worded will just piss me off. Funny, my boyfriend put some Elliott Smith on earlier today, and I didn't even think about it at the time. I'm a teacher and am focused on getting grades finished. They're due tomorrow. So, now here I sit, sipping (gulping down) a whiskey sour and writing narrative comments. I mean, please, how can you expect me to say substantive things about my students while completely sober when my future hangs in the balance? I am on the waitlist at Michigan, but the chances of actually getting in seem extremely slim to me.

So, thanks for starting the thread -- we deserve to have a good pity party. We all worked our asses off in an attempt to make our dreams happen, and we are watching our prospects slowly slip away. I'd rather all the letters came on one day-- one big day of rejection rather than this drawn out, painful, ultimately irritating process. I vacillate between not caring and caring desperately. I'm sure you all know what I mean.

JosephC

Mar 6, 2006, 7:51 PM

Post #19 of 1632 (32493 views)
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Re: [fictiondec] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

I've been rejected from Johns Hopkins, Cornell and Iowa. Montana and Indiana don't look too hopeful for me, as others were called or emailed last week. I'm holding out for a few others but they're very competitive, so we'll see. Thanks whoever gave us this thread to commiserate in, I'll need it (plus that whiskey sour you were just talking about, fictiondec.) Stir me up one!

*edited for spelling

(This post was edited by JosephC on Mar 6, 2006, 7:53 PM)

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 8:35 PM

Post #20 of 1632 (32418 views)
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Re: [JosephC] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

Someone told me that Jhumpa Lahiri didn't get into an MFA program when she first applied. Is that true? Who else? :)

sanssoleil
Chris

Mar 6, 2006, 8:52 PM

Post #21 of 1632 (32398 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

Nabokov, Borges, Genet and Proust all got rejected by Iowa, if that's any consolation to you all. (Of course, they later got accepted to Syracuse, Brown, Washington and Irvine, respectively)*

I'm feeling better, having gained some perspective. I'm going to get through the night with some help from my friends: "Friends." Syndicated sitcoms are salves for sucky days.

*I also read an interview with Arthur Bradford (Dogwalker) where he talks about his Iowa rejection.

stephkarto1
Stephanie Kartalopoulos

Mar 6, 2006, 9:31 PM

Post #22 of 1632 (32364 views)
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Re: [sanssoleil] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

I got my rejection letter from Brown, and I know my rejection letters from Emory and NYU are on the way.

(I have my MFA already--I'm applying to PhD programs in American Studies)

I have no idea what BU will bring.

But I have hope. Last minute hope. It turns out that Umass Boston has a kickass master's program in American Studies--and that their deadline is June 1 (it was March 1 for assistanceship consideration, but I have a meeting on Wednesday morning with the grad program director to talk about my VERY recent knowledge of the program, my background, my interests, and my application--and I will make a very strong appeal to her for being considered with the funding applicants).

And though I want to be in a doctoral program right now--it might not be a bad thing at all if I take a couple years for another master's degree and get some program-specific experience under my belt.

That's what's up with me.

And those of you who are getting rejection letters--it's nervewracking. Sing it loud with me! And it's frustrating! And enough to drive you to a depressed state where you're skipping going to the gym and curling up in a ball on your sofa or ordering more pizza than you thought you could handle eating in a month because it's comfort food and you can't BEAR the thought of using energy on anything other than checking your e-mail and opening envelopes that come in the mail.

BUT

Chin up. I have some friends who didn't get in anywhere their first time around--poetry and fiction--and they are amazing writers. Sometimes it's really this big thing in helping you shape your outlook and what you want from a program--and what you realistically have to GIVE to a program--and what you want to WALK AWAY WITH after a program--for those rejections to come.

And I wish all of you luck. I've been in and out of the rejection-game anxiety with my doctoral program rejections, and I got rejected EVERYWHERE but one MFA program (though it worked out so amazingly well--only program that accepted me was the program I dreamed of going to, so it was a total no-brainer and THE BEST academic experience of my life).

Sending all of you warmth, energy, and whatever endurance and strength I can muster to shove through the cyber-ether...

viviandarkbloom

Mar 6, 2006, 9:31 PM

Post #23 of 1632 (32364 views)
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Re: [clarabow] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and l	Can't Post

In Reply To

Someone told me that Jhumpa Lahiri didn't get into an MFA program when she first applied. Is that true? Who else? :)

Her collection of stories was also rejected by tons of publishers before it went on to win the Pultzer.

clarabow

Mar 6, 2006, 9:44 PM

Post #24 of 1632 (32346 views)
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Re: [stephkarto1] I haven't gotten in anywhere yet. I am happy that you have, but I can't read your posts about how hard it is to choose between schools right now. I used to go the Waiting game for comfort, but now it makes me feel like a big loser and	Can't Post

Oh, I wish you so much luck!!!! Deadlines? No problem!

Good luck!!! :)

gingembre

Mar 6, 2006, 10:30 PM

Post #25 of 1632 (32309 views)
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Re: [clarabow] let's talk about options, ba-by. let's talk about next year.	Can't Post

My next move is to start applying to summer writer's conferences. Most notably the Indiana conference, the school that rejected me from my only chance at escaping from a mind-numbing job for the next few years.

Though, of course, it's hard to warrant spending more money on applications when said mind-numbing job doesn't give me extra $$ for "indulgences" like getting writer rejections--yes, you detect more bitterness about job options from a rather limited B.A. degree...I guess I can look at it as practice for achieving yet another "worthless" degree, the MFA.

Gosh...the more I think about it, the more I wanted to start working on an MFA this coming fall.

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